Weigh In Wednesday

It has been almost 3 months since I decided to start this weight loss journey. There have been weeks I've worked my butt off, weeks I've gotten by with little effort and weeks I've wondered why I started this whole thing in the first place. BUT in 3 months I've learned things about myself that have opened my eyes. I've realized that the only thing holding me back is ME and that I'm tougher than I give myself credit for. I've learned that anything worth accomplishing is going to take hard work and whatever I put in is what I'm going to get out.

When I wake up in the morning, being overweight is the first thing I think about. When I get dressed, being overweight is what I think about. When I look at pictures of myself, being overweight is what I think about. When Chris tells me I look pretty, being overweight is what I think about. Guys I want to break free from that!! I'm so tired of it!! There's something about being overweight that makes you think there is no other way. That no matter how hard you try it doesn't matter. That people can treat you any way they feel because you're the one who let yourself go. That's NOT true!!  And it makes me sad to think I believed that for so many years.  

When I weighed in this morning I had gained .4 pounds. This past week I didn't try. Honesty, I was tired of the fight. I even had a moment when I thought, "I guess I'll just always be fat." What is wrong with me?!?! I've worked way to hard to lose 25 pounds to just gain it back.When Christmas gets here I want to look back and know I gave it everything I had. Yes, I've been on this weight loss journey for three months but weight loss takes time. I didn't gain 70 pounds in three months and I'm not going to get it off in three months. I'm only 27. I have so many years ahead of me. I want for those years to be happy maintaining years. I don't want to keep fighting this struggle forever. And when it comes down to it, being happy is so much better than food.

If I have to fight with everything in me to get this weight off I'm going to. I want to know what it feels like to have self confidence. I want to know what it feels like to not care what other people think about me because I'm happy with me. I want to wake up in the morning without thinking, "I'm so fat and overweight." It's going to be tough, really tough, but I've got to keep going!! And I know someone that wants to help me every step of the way...

Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. 

Isaiah 41:10